Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Why I Wouldn't Last Two Days as a Pioneer

Today is Pioneer Day in Utah.  Is this event recognized by Mormons outside of Utah?  If not, that's sad. 

In honor of this holiday I thought I'd compile a list on why I'd be the worst Pioneer ever:

  • I don't function well in temperatures of 90 degrees or above.
  • I don't function well in temperatures of 30 degrees or below.
  • I don't function well in rain, snow, or strong wind.
  • Basically I'm a big fat baby.
  • I think I'm scared of oxen.
  • I can't turn on a barbecue grill let alone start a fire.
  • I can barely get my clothes clean in the washing machine.  Only having access to a river and some stones would be a disaster.
  • I'm a mean person when I don't have a full stomach.
  • I gag when my child steps on dog poop.  Imagine sending him out to pick up buffalo poop.  Which is huge, by the way.
  • I can't sleep when I hear one person sleep.  Sleeping next to a whole company would be bad news.
  • I don't like camping outside.  Or in a tent for that matter.
  • My feet hurt when I walk around the block.
The list could go on and on.  But in all seriousness I'm grateful for the Pioneers and all of the sacrifices they made.  And I'm really glad I didn't have to be one.


  1. I didn't know there was such a thing as pioneer day until we moved here. Suddenly I had the day off of work and I was really confused. Haha! Yes, thank goodness for pioneers. I seriously couldn't handle it. I'm a baby. Speaking of babies...how about the women that walked for miles each day, 8 months pregnant, and then gave birth outside?!!? I love the hospital more and more every time I think about that.