Monday, December 12, 2011

Back to the Mother Ship

We are moving back to the Promised Land this week. Utah Valley, to be exact. I have mixed feelings about the move. I didn't grow up in Utah so a lot of things still puzzle me. Like college students doing a scavenger hunt in Wal-Mart at 11pm, wearing their pajamas....sober. Or the girls that are my age with 6 kids. Or meeting someone 5 houses down that isn't even in your ward boundary. However, there are a few things that I love about Utah that I am really looking forward to. Plus, this time I have kids so it will be a completely different experience.

1. Church will most likely be under 3 minutes away. Maybe we will even be able to walk.

2. The hairstylists. There is something great about a Utah trained stylist. Even if you are especially broke, there are like 13 different hair schools within a 5 mile radius where you can get your hair done for next to nothing.

3. Lots of cheap date places. And if you need cheap date ideas, just hang around the BYU campus for a few minutes.

4. Kneaders/Maglebys french toast.

5. Stephen's hot chocolate in every grocery store.

6. The mountains, the sky...a quick drive to the middle of nowhere.

7. Is it just me, or is it WAY easier to find good clothes in Utah?

8. Sidewalks. If you have ever lived in VA you will understand how wonderful sidewalks are.

9. The people out West are just prettier than the East. (East coasters, don't get your panties in a bunch. This was a generalization statement. I have met very pretty people in the East)

10. No one in Utah is going to ask me if I am my kids' nanny/ babysitter/big sister.

However, there are many things I will really miss about Virginia.

1. Kids are a novelty. I haven't had to take my grocery cart to the cart return in months. Someone always comes to take it from me. They also let me cut in line....and they buy my kids treats while we wait. Whereas in Utah, they would look at me and think, "Puhlease. Only 2? I just pushed out #7 on Thursday and I have already taken her newborn pictures myself, made her blessing dress and 11 different headband/hair poofs to match and I can manage to take my cart to the cart return."

2. Real Christmas trees...big ones...are only $20.

3. I only have to use chapstick once a day.

4. Going to the park in Dec. because it hasn't dropped below 50 yet.

5. Trader Joe's.

6. Diversity. The people that speak foreign languages are actually foreigners, not returned missionaries.

So, there you have it. We will be Utahns again by next week. I can't tell you how grateful I am to be going in a car and not a covered wagon.


  1. This was hilarious! Especially #1 under the things you will miss about VA. I heard about you from my friend Natalie! Good stuff here.

  2. You make me laugh. If you guys ever come back to CO, we need to hang out. This post made me laugh - I agree with everything. I was born in Virginia and I know exactly what you mean about the sidewalks. ; ) Have a safe trip to UT!

  3. OK I totally understand everything you said. And I totally agree with all of it.

    I agree on the hairstylists! I kind of just wait until I visit Utah to get my hair done...Love Kneaders and Maglebys!- I recently discovered those.
    ...Clothes ARE much easier to find there. (Go to the American Fork DI for good kids clothes ;)
    Westerners are just prettier because they are more into fashion and beauty than out east...
    I very much missed the VA novelty of children when we were in Utah!
    and I missed Trader Joes and the humidity.

    Oh yeah, you forgot, Utah has that great homemade bread in all the grocery stores... something severely lacking out east!

    Very funny. I enjoyed this post :)

  4. You only have two kids?!?! you must not be a very good mormon :) We're excited to see you soon.

  5. Super funny! Sad we didn't get to see more of you guys while we're out on the E coast. Maybe we'll make it back to UT someday.