Wednesday, November 23, 2011

My Spidey Senses Are Tingling

How hard is it to find a stinkin’ Superman toy?  My #1 is celebrating a birthday this week and I can’t find even one dinky Superman in this town.  (okay, I’ve only been to two major retailers.  But when you’ve got three kids to tow around, going to two stores is like going to 20 when you’re single.)

I mean, are Superman’s powers really that impressive?  Sure, he can fly, but if I had super powers I would do more than just fly.  As a matter of fact, I could list a whole shlew (if that’s a word?) of powers that would rock Superman’s world.  And these are what those powers would be.

1.)   Who needs to fly when you can disapparate?
2.)   My house could clean up itself after I gave the armpit-fart command. (the armpit-fart command would make me look oh-so-cool to my kids, after all.) 
3.)   My body could withstand the pressure of ocean water allowing me to swim to the bottom and collect gold.  Because I bet that’s where all the gold is.
4.)   The ability to make people do what I want whenever I want them to do it.  I would mostly use this when my child is about to scream something along the lines of “NO, I HATE GOING TO COSTCO!” or “I DON’T LIKE FOLDING LAUNDRY!”  That, and I could get free ice cream everywhere I went.)

What would your super powers be?


  1. probably flying. i hate paying for gas.

  2. Making delicious food appear with no slaving in the kitchen. And flying. Disapparating would be awesome, but you could see more while you flew :)